Taking sport too seriously

These are in the form of haikus, but they don't meet the thematic demands of a haiku, so I've called them sport shorts. They're short, they're all about sport. MICK PRICE SITTING I am famous for Five minutes twenty seconds Of sitting in awe. PETER NORMAN BLUES Barely a whisper Peter Norman sang his blues Lost his silver life. CHIN MUZAK He bowled a half-tracker. Fuck! He screamed. It went for six.  Fuck off! He then screamed. FAME Fame is for the few Whatever Andy Warhol Said to Sonny Lwho? RICHARD GASQUET TAKES TIME TO EVALUATE HIS PECULIAR LIFE Another fourth round; They said I’d be the greatest; Another third round. BREXIT WAS ALWAYS INEVITABLE The nation which named its Sports Personality Nigel Mansell. Twice. TOTO ON TOTO IN TOTO Signori scored more Goals than me for Italy. I’d rather be me. THE FINISHER The quicksand rises. I hold my form like a train - A trick, a triumph. THE UP AND DOWN

There’ll be a fight on 17 th February, at Manchester Arena, between George Groves and Chris Eubank Jr. The boxing industry is very excited about it; it seems an extremely well-matched fight between two highly accomplished, strong and talented boxers, and it’s very hard to pick a winner. It’s a semi-final of the World Boxing Super Series, wherein eight of some of the best super-middleweights in the world are contesting an innovative “tournament” format. The stakes are high. Higher than they should be, as far as I'm concerned. For me, as a boxing fan, this fight is telling me a lot about my changed relationship to boxing. More than excitement, my feelings about the fight are mainly concern and trepidation. I’m a fan of both Groves and Eubank. They’re skilful and strong and they’ve both been in several exciting fights. Super-middleweight is probably my favourite division, where the fighters are big, powerful men but yet still capable of being swift and deft. Many of Brita